Saturday, April 25, 2015

How To Prepare For Marriage Counseling In Huntington Beach

By Alta Alexander


Couples that seek counseling services indicate their desire to solve prevailing issues and remain together. However, marriage counseling in Huntington Beach will not be effective if individual partners are not adequately prepared. Couple therapy specialists point at the need to have reasonable expectations. It enables the couple to enjoy the benefits of therapy.

The common mentality is that you will vent frustration about your partner especially on what he does to compromise the relationship. The expectation is that the therapist will provide a solution which will enable you as a couple to return home happy. You may also expect to gain new or better skills that bring happiness to your relationship.

Most people identify their partners as the cause of trouble in any relationship. You hope that he or she will change. This mind set is dangerous since it is likely to block your mind from learning vital lessons. You are required to be open minded because the solution can only result from the acceptance by both parties. Each party has an accusation against the other and a point of appreciation. Each also has a role to play in fueling the conflict.

At no point is the counselor going to fix the problems in your relationship. The role of therapists is to assist in identifying points of conflict which makes it easy to find a solution. The session is a neutral platform where you can air your deepest concerns without fear or intimidation by your partner. Any change that will happen as a result of therapy will have to be initiated by the partners and away from the office.

The objectives of couple therapy are not only to solve current issues or to deal with problems. The sessions should help the partners to reflect on the kind of life they wish to build and enjoy together. It also is an opportunity for individual members to focus on becoming the best possible partner in that union. This realization will enable the two to build the kind of relationship they desire.

Individually, take time to spot the behaviors that hinder you from becoming the best partner you can ever be. Look at your dream relationship and find the things you have already abandoned. Focus on what you thought an ideal relationship and partner would do and seek to reignite that. This may require certain changes to take place. Therapy sessions help to open your mind to such possibilities.

As a couple, you have landed into this situation because of the contributions of each of you and over a period of time. Each has played a significant role in the crisis and has an even bigger responsibility to rectify the situation. The counseling session is not a time to defend your words and actions. It is a time to listen, admit your contribution and find a solution.

Couples attend therapy because the desire to remain together is still strong. Thus, evaluate what your union means and identify ways of making it work better. There are changes in attitudes and skills that will be required to actualize this. Recognize the good things that motivate your partner and work on them to build a stronger relationship.




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